The Adams Family
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The Adams Family
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Last edited by WidderWoman4 on Fri Jan 01, 2016 6:58 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: The Adams Family
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Last edited by WidderWoman4 on Fri Jan 01, 2016 6:58 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: The Adams Family
Jeffrey Cornet was enjoying a vigorous massage. He was having it in the exercise room in the penthouse of his very own high rise building in Manhattan. Across the room was a sidebar, complete with all the fixings for the healthiest and tastiest smoothies one could get on the planet, and glassware of the finest (and most expensive) Swarovski crystal one could purchase, custom made and engraved with his own signature. It was the same stemware used on his private jet, and had been flown in from Austria.
He looked up and waved to the casually dressed man who was walking into the room.
"Make yourself comfortable," Jeffrey said to the man. "I'm glad you could make it." He gestured toward the bar and said, "Help yourself. The refreshments here have to be better than that crummy and cheesy stuff you serve at your meetings in LA. Good grief, they are terrible! We have to get rid of them."
The man nodded in thanks, prepared a snack for himself, sat down, and awaited further instructions.
Jeffrey rose up and, shielded by his masseur, donned a snow white monogrammed terry cloth bathrobe, and sat on the table.
"Thanks, Whatsyourname," he said to the masseur. To his guest he added, "He's one of those personal trainers you are always having on your show. He's not so bad, actually. Okay, let's get down to business. You can call me 'Jefe' like my minions do. That's pronounced 'Hefay'. It's Spanish for chief, yes? It shows I embrace cultural diversity."
"My minions call me the Fleissmeister." the man replied. "I think we're on the same page, boss-wise."
"That remains to be seen," El Jefe mused aloud. "And speaking of minions, I hope your trained rodents are in the country legally? You know, they way they reproduce, I'm a bit worried about being overrun by them."
"I'll do my best to comply, but it isn't going to be easy to round them all up."
"Well, we have important things to discuss. We'll put that on the back burner for now, but we may have to get rid of a lot of them. Now, here's my brilliant idea. All my ideas are brilliant, you know. The buzz out there is your show is about as stale as your cheap crackers. Me - I need to keep my name in the news and polish up my brand. We could team up. You could be great again."
Fleiss nodded, deep in thought, his body language not unlike a caricature of Uncle Fester creating electricity. El Jefe took the silence as approval, and spoke again.
"You're not going to regret this, my friend. How can we miss? Oh! And speaking of Miss . . . Oh, wait, that's another thing I need to work on. OK, your first task is to get me some notes on your cast; I'll have the right of first refusal, of course. Meanwhile, I'll get the wife, Melanie, to work up some ideas to glam up the mansion. What do you think of gold plated roses? I wish we could do the show at The Breakers in Newport. Maybe I can make a deal for that. Oh, I think you are going to make a great apprentice!"
Fleiss was in a daze as El Jefe got off the massage table and walked across the room to shake his hand. Still reeling from the enormity of the challenge before him, he made as graceful an exit as he could, got on the express elevator to the ground floor, and caught a cab to the ABC headquarters. As he sat back for the ride, he muttered to himself. "Geez, this could be worse than being tossed into a volcano! And [shaking his head] you can get glassware just as good at that Libbey Glass outlet in Toledo, Ohio."
He looked up and waved to the casually dressed man who was walking into the room.
"Make yourself comfortable," Jeffrey said to the man. "I'm glad you could make it." He gestured toward the bar and said, "Help yourself. The refreshments here have to be better than that crummy and cheesy stuff you serve at your meetings in LA. Good grief, they are terrible! We have to get rid of them."
The man nodded in thanks, prepared a snack for himself, sat down, and awaited further instructions.
Jeffrey rose up and, shielded by his masseur, donned a snow white monogrammed terry cloth bathrobe, and sat on the table.
"Thanks, Whatsyourname," he said to the masseur. To his guest he added, "He's one of those personal trainers you are always having on your show. He's not so bad, actually. Okay, let's get down to business. You can call me 'Jefe' like my minions do. That's pronounced 'Hefay'. It's Spanish for chief, yes? It shows I embrace cultural diversity."
"My minions call me the Fleissmeister." the man replied. "I think we're on the same page, boss-wise."
"That remains to be seen," El Jefe mused aloud. "And speaking of minions, I hope your trained rodents are in the country legally? You know, they way they reproduce, I'm a bit worried about being overrun by them."
"I'll do my best to comply, but it isn't going to be easy to round them all up."
"Well, we have important things to discuss. We'll put that on the back burner for now, but we may have to get rid of a lot of them. Now, here's my brilliant idea. All my ideas are brilliant, you know. The buzz out there is your show is about as stale as your cheap crackers. Me - I need to keep my name in the news and polish up my brand. We could team up. You could be great again."
Fleiss nodded, deep in thought, his body language not unlike a caricature of Uncle Fester creating electricity. El Jefe took the silence as approval, and spoke again.
"You're not going to regret this, my friend. How can we miss? Oh! And speaking of Miss . . . Oh, wait, that's another thing I need to work on. OK, your first task is to get me some notes on your cast; I'll have the right of first refusal, of course. Meanwhile, I'll get the wife, Melanie, to work up some ideas to glam up the mansion. What do you think of gold plated roses? I wish we could do the show at The Breakers in Newport. Maybe I can make a deal for that. Oh, I think you are going to make a great apprentice!"
Fleiss was in a daze as El Jefe got off the massage table and walked across the room to shake his hand. Still reeling from the enormity of the challenge before him, he made as graceful an exit as he could, got on the express elevator to the ground floor, and caught a cab to the ABC headquarters. As he sat back for the ride, he muttered to himself. "Geez, this could be worse than being tossed into a volcano! And [shaking his head] you can get glassware just as good at that Libbey Glass outlet in Toledo, Ohio."
Last edited by Buckeye Belle on Tue Oct 13, 2015 12:17 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: The Adams Family
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Last edited by WidderWoman4 on Fri Jan 01, 2016 6:59 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: The Adams Family
The Adams Family
MESSAGE BOARD
Savvy in Savannah
I think OWL means Ornery Women Laughing.
Cynical Cynthia
The real reason Abigail won by a landslide was because hardly any of the men voted.
MESSAGE BOARD
Savvy in Savannah
I think OWL means Ornery Women Laughing.
Cynical Cynthia
The real reason Abigail won by a landslide was because hardly any of the men voted.
_________________
Belle
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Re: The Adams Family
It was late enough in the evening to be pitch dark outside, with only the moon and stars for illumination. The only sound was that of tires crackling occasionally on the long driveway to the Bachelor mansion.
One by one, 25 extremely attractive women, who looked to be in their mid- to late twenties, gracefully exited one of five limousines. Each had long, flowing hair and a winning smile. Interestingly, although they were impeccably dressed in obviously high end attire, their clothes appeared a little more business like than typical evening wear.
One by one, the ladies walked from the limo on the shining stone to the entry way to the mansion. There, she shook hands with the man standing there and engaged in a brief conversation before she went inside.
The ladies were identified as
Car 1
Martha
Dolley
Elizabeth
Louisa
Rachel
Car 2
Emily
Sarah
Hannah
Angelica
Anna
Car 3
Letitia
Priscilla
Julia
Margaret
Harriet
Car 4
Mary
Eliza
Lucy
Ellen
Rose
Car 5
Caroline
Frances
Ida
Edith
Eleanor
Eleanor, the last woman to greet the man, was heard to say, "Good evening. We're honored to be here tonight and looking forward to what we learn. May we get started now? We're from the Secret Service.
One by one, 25 extremely attractive women, who looked to be in their mid- to late twenties, gracefully exited one of five limousines. Each had long, flowing hair and a winning smile. Interestingly, although they were impeccably dressed in obviously high end attire, their clothes appeared a little more business like than typical evening wear.
One by one, the ladies walked from the limo on the shining stone to the entry way to the mansion. There, she shook hands with the man standing there and engaged in a brief conversation before she went inside.
The ladies were identified as
Car 1
Martha
Dolley
Elizabeth
Louisa
Rachel
Car 2
Emily
Sarah
Hannah
Angelica
Anna
Car 3
Letitia
Priscilla
Julia
Margaret
Harriet
Car 4
Mary
Eliza
Lucy
Ellen
Rose
Car 5
Caroline
Frances
Ida
Edith
Eleanor
Eleanor, the last woman to greet the man, was heard to say, "Good evening. We're honored to be here tonight and looking forward to what we learn. May we get started now? We're from the Secret Service.
_________________
Belle
Buckeye Belle- Power User
- Posts : 438
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Join date : 2013-03-03
Location : Holy Toledo!
Re: The Adams Family
Deleted
Last edited by WidderWoman4 on Fri Jan 01, 2016 6:59 pm; edited 1 time in total
WidderWoman4- Power User
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Re: The Adams Family
Deleted
Last edited by WidderWoman4 on Fri Jan 01, 2016 7:00 pm; edited 1 time in total
WidderWoman4- Power User
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Re: The Adams Family
Deleted
Last edited by WidderWoman4 on Fri Jan 01, 2016 7:00 pm; edited 1 time in total
WidderWoman4- Power User
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Re: The Adams Family
Sorry, if anyone was looking at this. The story I was writing would have been very dark, with all kinds of psychological damage done to the characters. I don't want to start the new year that way. (Although, I must admit, I did like the Interstate 5 part.)
Maybe I'll think of something lighter later.
Maybe I'll think of something lighter later.
WidderWoman4- Power User
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Re: The Adams Family
Aww, I just found it today and had read up to this morning's installment. I got lots of chuckles out of it while it lasted.
WidderWoman4 wrote:Sorry, if anyone was looking at this. The story I was writing would have been very dark, with all kinds of psychological damage done to the characters. I don't want to start the new year that way. (Although, I must admit, I did like the Interstate 5 part.)
Maybe I'll think of something lighter later.
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